My Theme for the Year

"Don't cling to a mistake just because
you spent a lot of time making it." ~ Unknown

Guilty! 

But no more! Major changes have recently occurred for the better in my life as a result of letting go. Now my mind is set on moving forward.

To that end, I've adopted a theme to apply to my life at this stage. It's a combination of choosing and committing. You could say it's committing to my choices, or choosing to commit.

The central theme in both is the same:

Commitment!

What does commitment look like for me? It boils down to these four steps:

1. Define and clarify my priorities, then set goals.
2. Schedule time in my calendar to work on my goals.
3. Eliminate what does not contribute toward my goals.
4. Strengthen the performance of these steps into habit.

There are a few areas of my life that need refinement based on my priorities. Let this be the year I focus on those things.

More to come...

Priorities!

Updated 8/26/2019 - So, where have I been? Well, blogging wasn't one of my priorities. I've been relocating due to separation from my wife, and I've going over my priorities, which are:

Priority #1 - My relationship with God, especially through the study of His word (2 Tim 2:15).

Priority #2 - Read & write, especially a) toward the goal of getting published, and b) toward the goal of writing something deeply meaningful to me.

Priority #3 - Health & wellness, especially in the development of daily eating and fitness habits.

Now that I've set my priorities, I will share my progress with these priorities as well as other areas I deem as important, such as volunteer work on behalf of adult survivors of child abuse.

Harmony, Peace, Good - Goals for 2018 and Beyond (Part 1)

Live in Harmony with One Another. 

Live in harmony with one another. If two singers sing the same notes at the same pitch, it is not harmony. If one sings melody while another sings bass, it is not quite harmony either. But, if each sings notes, even words, unique to themselves while complementary to the other, that is harmony.

I must sing as I am able, in my voice range and with tonal quality and dynamic volume, using meaningful and thoughtful lyrics that come from my heart.

Yet, if all the world's a stage, it is not my time to bellow a solo. Alas, the stage is quite populated. Nor am I the Director who decides who else is on the stage. To seek to harmonize, I must listen carefully to other voices as well. Music is the result of collaboration, be it duo, quartet, or orchestra.

Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, "Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord." To the contrary, "if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head." Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. (Romans 12:16-21)

I believe there is a reason Paul included this advice to the Christians and would-be Christians in Rome. It is simply this:

This is good, and it is pleasing in the sight of God our Savior, who desires all people to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth. (1 Timothy 2:3-4)

~   ~   ~

Note to the reader:

To live in harmony with one another is just one of my many goals for 2018 and beyond. My other goals include living peaceably with all, and overcoming evil with good, phrases also found in the same passage above. I will write about those goals in later posts.

My hope and prayer for you are that God draws you to Himself, and then you diligently seek Him. For God so loved the world (John 3:16a), absolutely, and that includes you specifically.

If this devotional has touched your heart, please do not keep it for yourself. Share it. Leave a comment if you'd like. But most of all, thank God, the Father of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Major Milestones Reporting for Duty, Sir! (Letters to My Father - January 1, 2017)

"So, this is your first blog post of 2017? It also happens to be your hundredth post? Plus, you are revitalizing your newsletter? Congratulations, Major Milestones, what a way to bring in the New Year! Well done. At ease, Major."

Joking aside, I did some reflecting and pondering yesterday; reflecting on lessons I learned in 2016, and pondering what may lie ahead in 2017. Both were enjoyable exercises. I asked myself:

• What were the top five or ten things I learned in the past year? 
• What are the top five or ten things I want to accomplish in the year ahead? 

Then I focused on one each, the most important lesson and goal:

• What was the single most significant lesson for me in 2016? 
• What will be my primary focus going forward in 2017?

Well, typical for me in my morning quiet time, I wrote a letter to my Father. It went something like this...

Dear Father, January 1, 2017

What better way to start the New Year than to spend time with You, reflecting on where we've been and pondering what lies ahead. I ask myself, "What are the top ten things I learned in 2016?" No doubt, most -if not all- of them regard spiritual matters. To me, those are the lessons that matter most. They are my Revelations For Life itself.

Probably, the most significant thing I learned in 2016 was to purify my motives when interacting with others about spiritual matters as a Christian. Specifically, I was attending a local church for the wrong reasons. I was trying to please others, not You, Father, while at the same time I disagreed with the doctrines of that church.

I see now my attitude was hypocritical. There is no room for compromise if I want to walk in the Spirit (and I do). I must work out my own salvation, not someone else's. Nor do I want to be arrogantly engaged in discussions of right and wrong biblical interpretations and human traditions that tear down. Who am I to cast judgement on another's personal spiritual journey?

Rather, may I always be ready to give a reasonable answer, with all gentleness, seasoned with salt, to anyone who asks about the hope that is in me, that is Christ. And if they don't ask, I won't shove it down their throats. If they stop listening, I'll stop talking. You respected my journey at every stage, Father, even before I knew You, or wanted to know You. Why shouldn't I do likewise?

Furthermore, I am sure You reward those who diligently seek You. In that regard, let me be an instrument in Your Hands, Father, to communicate Your abounding love, Your boundless mercy, Your amazing grace, the depth of Your riches in Christ, etc. Not for my own glory, but for Yours.

Looking forward to 2017, my heart desires so much to reach those who long for Your wisdom, but struggle to find direction and truth in this world. I was hurt and betrayed by those who called themselves Christian religious leaders and were instead wolves in sheep's clothing. There are so many of them! How do I know who to follow?  How do I know who is speaking the truth? What is truth? Where is truth?

I also want to fellowship with those who love You and are called according to Your purpose. There are always more insights into Your manifold wisdom to be discovered. May I apply myself to build up my brothers and sisters in Christ, and to be built up by them. Help me to be kind to others, tenderhearted, forgiving others as You forgave me in Christ. Let my words give grace to those who hear.

For these reasons, looking forward to 2017, I plan to write in my blog consistently with purpose, communicating boldly the love You've shown me. I hope readers will stay with me throughout the year as I open my heart to the lessons You have taught me and continue to teach me. I pray our hearts will be enlightened by the power of Your Spirit working in us.

Perhaps the spiritual journeys of mine and some of the readers of my blog will come to a crossroad of mutual benefit, where we find ourselves eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace, walking in manner worthy of the calling to which we have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love.

Love,
Dwight

What is Your "Why?" How is Your "Who?" Where is Your "When?"

The answers to these questions are significant to living your fullest. In a huge way, they contribute to defining what "living your fullest" means to you.

Here are the 3 questions I like to combine to begin* giving the clearest vision for finding, and living, your purpose in life. To round it out, ask yourself these questions, not once, not twice, but at least 3 to 5 times. Depth is amazing; so dive in!

• What is your "Why?" 
• How is your "Who?"
• Where is your "When?"

* I say "begin" because in your journey through life, there are other major contributions to living with purpose. Expect to continue refining your vision and mission, receiving and implementing feedback, and adjusting your walk based on experience and knowledge.

What do those questions mean?

What is your "Why?" creates a clear assertion you proclaim to yourself, and others as necessary, as the reason why you live. It is the discovery of God's will for your life on earth.

As you read and assimilate God's word, what stirs in your heart to the point of moving your feet? Thoughts in relation to others, lost or saved, and that begin with "I would love to..." can provide excellent insight into aligning your purpose with God's eternal plan.

In what way would you be inclined to come alongside others just as Christ came alongside you and is indeed in you? Answer "Why?" until you know it by heart, and then live by heart.

How is your "Who?" gives you an honest assessment of the welfare of the very people you intend to serve by providing the most value to the quality of their lives.

We know the only word of God can truly transform a person. We know He sends His Spirit to meet a person wherever they are in life. (They don't have to pre-qualify to receive the love of Christ.) We also know He loves them too much to leave them where they are.

Are you prepared to meet others where they are in life? Do you have a heart or yearning for people in, or from, particular circumstances? What are their situations and attitudes now, and where do you want to help them go and grow?

We know God gives the growth. How much are you willing to sacrifice in order to plant or water? How can you make yourself more receptive to them to increase your influence for their good? Are you really listening to understand their pain, security, and struggles?

Where is your "When?" locates your time for these resulting, purposeful tasks. It is the act of transforming your intangible dreams into tangible goals. It is living on purpose.

We all have something we want to do someday. But what can you do today that will move you in the direction of your purpose and goals? What about this week? This month?

If you're like me, tools for writing down and scheduling goals come in so handy; calendars, reminders, smart phone apps, to do lists, etc. Where can you store this information about your purpose and goals so they are readily available, and perhaps even alert you when things need to be done? What tools and methods works best for you? Use them wisely.

Final Note:

Living your purpose on purpose should be both challenging and rewarding. Helping others makes the hard work of getting clarity of purpose, sacrificing personally, and absorbing life experiences all worthwhile.

Learn to welcome the challenge of understanding your purpose; what it is, who it serves, and when you can live it out. Engaging with a Christian Life Coach can help you through this discovery process to maximize the value you can contribute as God's servant-leader.

~ ~ ~

Note: No doubt, you will have to put something else off in order to address these questions properly. You might as well decide right here and now what is less important than finding out what "living your fullest" means. You don't have to answer the questions right now; you can if you want. But, at least start thinking about how you can make time to do so.

Ask yourself, "What lies cold and empty inside you, like a worthless habit, that you can readily give up in order to stoke the coals that would set your soul on fire for God?"

Block time in your hectic schedule and get ready for some profound discovery! It is well-worth it because you are well worth it. Think of it as others unwittingly waiting for you to discover your purpose so you can positively impact their lives.

As always, in prayer with faith, in your words with action, seek God's righteousness first (Matthew 6:33), be transformed by the renewal of your mind, and do not be conformed to the patterns of this world (Romans 12:2). God bless you and others who will be blessed through your choice to live on purpose. Amen!


For the original post with more information about Christian Life Coaching, click here:
www.RevelationsForLifeChristianCoaching.com/seeking-purpose

Embracing Change

Have you heard this story? A mother nudges her son, who is still in bed, curled on his side with his back to her, on a school day. The alarm was snoozed about 10 minutes ago, permanently, when the plug landed gently on the carpet just 14 inches below the socket from which it was yanked. 

"Come on! Get up! You'll be late for school," was the encouragement accompanying the nudge.

"I don't wanna go to school!" Muffled by blankets, his response didn't need to be clear to be heard. His mother sensed it was coming. 

Not enough time passed for impatience or anger to build yet. "What's the matter this time?" In a tone expectant of some phony excuse.

"I don't wanna go. Nobody likes me. I don't have any friends there. The teachers pick on me behind my back. And to top it off, the school lunch is cold and soggy."

His mother grinned silently at the latter comment, but came back with a retort nevertheless. "Okay, I'll pack you a nice lunch, but you're still going to school. I understand. It's a big school and not everyone is going to like everyone else. If you want a friend, be a friend. And don't worry about what the teachers say behind your back. Worry about your own integrity. Besides, they all need you. You're 38 years old and you're the principal! Now get up!"

Perspective. Funny how situations are defined by perspectives. If you haven't heard that story, no doubt you expected the son to be a young student. Although intended as a joke here, in real life it's a very sad thing when an adult acts like a child.

Growing. Getting older is inevitable, but maturing is not. Perhaps you know of someone like this. Aggravating, isn't it. But, just yelling a command at the person only frustrates you both. So don't concern yourself with changing others. Look to yourself. Are you growing up? Maturity is the result of a deliberate choice to extend effort and focus to become something you're not already.

Let's face it, change happens! It is said, "The only constant is change." You either purposely seek it, simply acknowledge it, or deny it. To simply acknowledge change is to be its beneficiary or victim. Your attitude pretty much decides which. Usually, it's a spontaneous attitude of the moment, and it is involuntarily given the power to determine your mood. But, either way it's not often expected. It just happens. We just recognize that it did. To deny change takes effort, but that effort is not at all focused on any good that come as a result of change. In fact, the effort is in pretending things are the same, or that things could go back to the way they were. You will always be the victim in either case.

Embrace change. Even seek it. Since change is inevitable, prepare for it. In fact, always be partially preparing, partially adjusting, looking for the good, and being wholly grateful. Embracing change is often a bittersweet journey; to welcome the new is to say goodbye to the old. Welcoming can be sweet, very sweet at times, even joyful, like the birth of a child. Saying goodbye can be bitter, very bitter at times, like grieving the loss of a loved one. But, to really get the sweet part, not just on the surface, you cannot deny the bitter part. Both are deep. Such is life. Do more than accept it. Embrace it.

So, wake up! Attend this school called life. Study hard. Learn inward as well as outward. Prepare for quizzes and tests. Participate in extracurricular activities. Take recess once in a while. Be a friend. The world needs you, all of you, whether you're 8, 38, or 98. Live your life like everything about it is a miracle, because it is. 

As a Christian, I even embrace the death of Christ as a miracle, because He is the propitiation for the sins of the whole world (1 John 2:2). Because of the work He did, and because God raised Him, I'm not only reconciled to God, but God has adopted me as His son (Romans 8:15). Because God loved me so much, and I was willing to turn to Him and see this love (John 3:16, 17:3). I didn't always believe in Him. I had slowly changed my mind about Him as I learned from Him directly from scripture. I had, and still have, an excellent pastor-teacher, but fear not that you won't. I believe when the student is ready, the teacher will come. He rewards those who diligently seek Him (Hebrews 11:6). I stopped looking to man's religion and that's when I started seeing His kingdom and His righteousness. It is a gift of God and all His doing (Ephesians 2:8-9) and wonderful beyond words (Ephesians 3:20-21). For to me, to live is Christ (Philippians 1:21a)! After all,"we know that all things work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28).

Please, Make Yourself at Home!

One of my favorite verses follows Judas' simple question...

Judas (not Iscariot) said to him, "Lord, how is it that you will manifest yourself to us, and not to the world?" Jesus answered him, "If anyone loves me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him. (John 14:22-23) 

The Greek word for 'keep' used here means to guard or protect, usually from loss or injury.  To me, this verse means that if we love Him, motivated by His love for us, then we will guard and even cherish His word in our hearts. Our thoughts will become His thoughts as we are transformed by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2). And if we guard and cherish His word in our hearts, Jesus and His Father will come and make themselves at home in our hearts. After all, home is wherever the heart is.

Then & Now and Now & Then

Two years ago, I said I would follow my heart's passion and write more. (Write to Heal) I've written a few entries since then, but this hardly constitutes evidence of my heart overflowing with creativity.

I need to 'fess up. Most of my entries were lessons given, not lessons learned. In 'Write to Heal' I made myself vulnerable and it was appreciated. I was encouraged by the feedback. And I learned a lot.

I recently told my wife I wanted to write again. I needed that creative outlet. She said, and I paraphrase, "Well, you usually write about ideas and stuff. Why not write about you?" She told me the story of another relative who writes and concluded, "Know what I love about his writing? It's real. It's inspiring, but it's really him and things he goes through, good and bad."

I thought, "I could do that." (Actually, I already knew I could do this because I've done it!) I not only felt I was wasting my talent (if I may be so bold to admit to having any), but I was hiding behind it, too. Most of my blog entries here barely scratch the surface. Vulnerability? Nah! It's merely a flesh wound! ("What are you going to do? Bleed all over me?")

Be prepared to squirm. Be prepared to cry and sometimes sob. Be prepared for a genuine belly-laugh. Be prepared for bitter-sweet laughter. Be prepa... - I'm talking to myself, by the way - ...red for open honesty. Be prepared to be scared. Be prepared to love and be loved. Be prepared to be hurt and feel lonely. Be prepared to know real joy and peace.

I want to - scratch that. I will write about my current faith and my childhood experiences; my struggles and fears; my many losses and stupid mistakes; my roles as family, friend, father, and husband; my pursuit of work and desire for play. In the end, I still have hope. In fact, I have more hope than when I started. But not in me, however, in Him. I'll tell you something about that soon, maybe next in my next blog entry. Until then, it's now and then.

Disclaimer - My intention is to inspire others to be genuine, vulnerable, and follow their hearts. In the process of being real, I may offend some. For this, I apologize in advance. Please forgive me.

A Simple Formula for Success

I was recently listening to Earl Nightingale's program called "Lead the Field". In it, he talks about many fundamental truths about success. For example, he says, "luck is when preparedness meets opportunity, and opportunity is always there." In other words, if you seek to have good luck, get prepared for the opportunities that already surround you. Here's another gem...

I slept and dreamt that life was joy.
I awoke and saw that life was service.
I acted and behold, service was joy.
Rabindranath Tagore

The formula for success is simple, and its beauty is in its simplicity.

I slept and dreamt that life was joy.
First, you will find yourself sleeping, but that first discovery is key. The power of awareness is the seed of change. Now that you know you're sleeping, dream of what could be. Here, it is revealed that life is joy. What is your dream?

I awoke and saw that life was service.
Second, the clarity of your dreams - what you want and why you want it, both in detail - will open your eyes to see tasks that maybe, just maybe, you can do. Why, of course you can do these tasks given to you! But doubt and fear will try to persuade you otherwise. Conversely, you will not see these tasks if you do not dream, or if your dream is not clear enough.

I acted and behold, service was joy.
Third, do the tasks you now see with the purpose and vision of pursuing the very dream(s) that shed light on these actions. You will discover the joy of the journey. Happiness is a direction, not a destination. In addition, that discovery will never cease to amaze you. Let it be a profound source of wonder as you discover that, after all, life is joy, just as you dreamt.

My journey includes...
Personally, I love certain famous quotes because they help me stay focused on my journey. At first, it can be easy to see the pursuit as fruitless when we encounter difficulties. After a while, we see the difficulties as necessary challenges that help us grow. After that, we come to know that growth is what makes this journey, called life, such a wonderful adventure.

"You must do the thing you think you cannot do."
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Our doubts are traitors,
And make us lose the good we oft might win
By fearing to attempt.
- William Shakespeare

"Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.".
- Henry Ford

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
- Marianne Williamson

The key to a successful journey is momentum.
To venture on a new path is exciting, even exhilarating, at first. It would be wise to note that the burst of energy is there for a reason. Your environment must also change in order to support the journey. Your immediate surroundings, however, sometimes known as your comfort zone, will insist you do not risk the unknown. This is an illusion. For the real risk is in not changing. Change is inevitable. Growth is not. Build momentum with focus and enthusiasm. What's your intention?